From Fertilizer to Flower

Do you know someone who is very beautiful on the outside but lacks inner beauty? Like, Wow! Great hair, pretty eyes, perfect skin, well sculpted frame- this person has won the physical features lottery.

Then, as it turns out, their beauty is lost because it only runs skin deep. You no longer see them as attractive. You remember the way they treat others, their lack of kindness, grace and humanity. I think of the movie “ The Devil Wears Prada” where Meryl Streep portrays a rich, attractive woman who is so ugly on the inside that her beauty is overshadowed by that ugliness.

I also know some extremely beautiful people who become more and more stunning each day. They convey such an inner beauty that age, wrinkles, and scars are erased by the human eye.

I’m thinking of some of my friends and family whose presence lights up any room. This light comes from a place deep inside- a place that speaks of life experiences which are often wrought with pain, loss, and disappointment. The light comes from knowing that God has seen them through those dark moments. Their depth of character has been forged through valleys and shadows. These folks are my heroes.

I only know about their history because, during my darkest moments, they graciously shared it with me. The sharing was not easy. Remembering was not easy. I was surprised.

How can such beauty arise from ashes? Then it hit me. This person is more beautifully beautiful. More resiliently resilient. More refined because God used their pain to create a work of art only seen when the finer details are carved into their being.

I do not want to have pain just so I can be more beautiful. I’ll settle for average, if that’s okay. How about if I just agree to be as lovely as possible and we will skip the whole pain part?

Unfortunately, life is painful. It is also wonderful and amazing. Some days, especially with my ADHD brain, I go from ecstasy to tragedy in mere moments. I’m so happy. Life is cool. I’m so ticked off. Life is cruel. What I love is knowing that God is with me equally, in all moments. I don’t think everything happens for a reason. I think God works in our lives despite whether there is a reason or not. Sometimes crap happens. The Bible says that “All things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28)

He will, however, take the crappy things that happen and turn it into fertilizer.

Trying to be a sunflower despite it all-

Elaine